The Cause of my Stroke

I think I figured out what caused me to have a stroke. A couple of weeks ago, completely and totally beloved Barbara, my Mom and I went over to Gruene, which is a little touristy town close to New Braunfels. It has a lot of character, and a dancehall that every local loves. It’s not air conditioned, it looks like it might fall down, and there’s always good music in the evenings of the Texas country persuasion. It’s also the place a young feller named George Strait got some stage time before he went off to Tennessee to impress the poohbahs there.

Anyway, Mom was in one of those shops where they sell all the tourist junk and C&TB Barbara and I were sitting on a bench outside. There was a little girl coming down the street who was just cuter than a bug. It was Sunday and she had on a white dress with lacey stuff at the bottom with red ribbons pulled through it, and her hair was tied up like puppy-dog ears and tied with red ribbons too. She was holding a leash with one of those Westy terriers attached and his hair was tied up the same way. Although C&TB Barbara doesn’t like Westies, she loves dogs in general so she asked the little girl what her name was. She said “Petal” and my sweetie asked her how she got that name. “When I was in my Mommy’s tummy she and Daddy were sitting in that park over there and some flowers from the tree fell on her, so they decided to name me Petal”. C&TB asked her what her doggies name was. “Porky” she said. So Barbara asked her why his name was Porky. The sweet little girl said “Because he likes to fuck pigs.”

And I laughed so hard I bet I busted something loose in that dried up walnut I call a brain. That’s why I had a stroke, I’m betting you.